Is there anything better than a good Seinfeld quote? We don’t think so, which is why we’ve compiled our favorite Seinfeld quotes EVER. Scroll through and share these Seinfeld quotes with friends for more than a few laughs. You should’ve seen her face. It was the exact same look my father gave me when I told him I wanted to be a ventriloquist.-George I need the secure packaging of Jockeys. My boys need a house!-Kramer If you can’t say something bad about a relationship you shouldn’t say anything at all.-George Mr. Ross: I
Quotes
Quotes
We’ve seen quite a few funny facebook status updates in our day, and it feels like the more friends we get the more we find. What is it about facebook that makes people say the stupidest or smartest things? We’ve written our share of clunkers, but we WISH we wrote these super funny facebook status updates instead. We’ll keep posting more funny facebook status updates as we find them, but in the meantime enjoy these zingers! This hangover feels like Quentin Tarantino directed it. I finally found a diet plan that works. It’s called “The
Hilarious Facebook Status Updates: Part 1
This girl next to me in class has a piece of tape over her laptop webcam. This can only mean she’s made some serious mistakes in her past…
Funny yearbook quotes have become a sort of rite of passage for graduating Seniors, and we couldn’t be happier. Sure, students could go the more serious route and put an inspirational quote for their graduating class, but what’s the point of making them feel inspired when you can make them laugh until they cry? This collection of funny yearbook quotes contains some of the best ones we’ve ever seen. And we’re even noticing patterns that are starting to emerge in these funny yearbook quotes. You’ve got your dumb blonde jokes, rapper jokes, religious jokes, gamer jokes, sexist jokes,
105 Funny Yearbook Quotes
Funny yearbook quotes have become a sort of rite of passage for graduating Seniors, and we couldn’t be happier. Sure, students could go the more serious route and put an inspirational quote for their graduating class, but what’s the point of making them …
There are so many great Arrested Development quotes that it’s hard to put a list together—there’s way too many to choose from! And considering there are now four hilarious seasons of the show on Netflix, I’m sure we’ll have even more as we re-watch them. But in the meantime, these are a few of our favorite Arrested Development quotes that we think deserve top billing as some of the funniest quotes ever. After you’ve gone through these hilarious Arrested Development quotes, check out our lists of even more Funny Quotes! Great, so now we don’t have a car or
Best Arrested Development Quotes
Tobias: What are you doing up here?
George Sr.: I'm having a [bleep]ing tea party, what does it look like I'm doing? [shoves Tobias against the wall and covers his mouth with his hand] I'm living up here and if you tell anyone about this, I will [bleep]ing kill you. Ah, stop licking my hand, you horse's ass.
Funny inspirational quotes can do a lot to not only lift your spirits but to remind you that even the great ones like Albert Einstein never took life too seriously. Below is a collection of our favorite funny inspirational quotes from Albert Einstein, Mark Twain, Lily Tomlin, Steve Martin, Robert Frost, and more. Enjoy, and be inspired! Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.- Thomas Eddison If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito. – Betty
Funny doctor jokes are some of the best jokes out there, mostly because doctors are anything but funny. If they were, these 10 funny doctor jokes might be a little more accurate. But the bottom line is they make us laugh! Below are 10 of our favorite funny doctor jokes floating around the interwebs today. What do you call 2 orthopedic doctors reading an EKG? A double blind study! Q What is the difference between God and an orthopedic surgeon A God doesn’t think he is an orthopedic surgeon. Did you hear about the latest
10 Funny Doctor Jokes
Doctor: Nurse, how is that little boy doing, the one who swallowed ten quarters? Nurse: No change yet.
Yearbook quotes and moments will live forever. No matter how old you are, you most likely will always have your yearbook and your children and grand children will be able to dig them up and see what their grandma or grandpa looked like when they were a high school student. So it’s important to make sure you pick the right quote that goes next to your name in your yearbook. (Not all high schools allow their students to put quotes next to their names.) But this is a funny picture gallery of high school yearbook quotes and moments that that
19 Yearbook Quotes and Moments Students Will Regret
Yearbook quotes and moments will live forever. No matter how old you are, you most likely will always have your yearbook and your children and grand children will be able to dig them up and see what their grandma or grandpa looked like when they …
Dad Jokes are a wonderful new term for those terrible jokes that all dads tell. You know the ones we’re talking about. When you were young and brought a girl over the for first time and your dad lays out a super corny dad jokes. Of course dad loves his dad jokes and thinks he’s being hilarious. But, everyone else is just rolling their eyes. Here are the 50 Greatest dad jokes of all time. 1. Me: I just found a home for a bunch of dad jokes on the Internet and they’re great. Now everything you say will
50 Greatest Dad Jokes Ever
34. Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? The p is silent.
Here are 107 of the best celebrity graduation quotes of all time for commencement speech season. Everyone from Will Ferrell to Bill Cosby to Whoopi Goldberg and everyone in between have given graduation speeches at universities for years. So here are some of the best celebrity graduation quotes that range from the funny to the inspirational to the flat out great advice. “Try putting your iPhones down every once in a while and look at people’s faces.” – Amy Poehler, Harvard University, 2011 “There’s few things that get you over your own crap more than working hard.” – Adam
The 107 Greatest Graduation Quotes Ever
"Remember that there’s no one way of doing things. … If you just get a hammer and hit it really hard, whatever it is, I guarantee you it’ll open."
- Fred Armisen, Oregon Episcopal School, 2011
Laws are, for the most part, there to protect us as a society. But what about all those dumb laws out there that are STILL on the books, and nobody knows why (or how)? In case you’ve ever wondered what a dumb law looks like, we’ve compiled a list of state’s DUMBEST laws for your satisfaction. And if you happen to live in in one of the states that these dumb laws exist in, don’t say we never warned you! Behold, a look at the weirdest laws you might ever see. Click through and enjoy their craziness! In Alabama
Dumb Laws Still On the Books in the United States
In California, you are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.
These funny Rodney Dangerfield jokes and one-liners are some of the comedian’s best material. We put together this collection of classic and hilarious Rodney Dangerfield jokes to honor the late comedian, who is one of the best of all-time. While Rodney Dangerfield loved to say he “got no respect,” that was not the case when it came to being one of the world’s funniest comedians. Click through the funny jokes and one-liners below, and check out the Rodney Dangerfield profile page on Dose of Funny to get even more jokes, quotes, and funny photos of the comedian, all in one place. I tell
38 Funny Rodney Dangerfield Jokes and One-Liners
I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
These Bill Cosby quotes and jokes are hilarious, eclectic and most of all – awesome. It’s hard to boil the best of these Bill Cosby quotes and jokes down to the best since his career has spanned over 50 years. He has forgotten more jokes than more comedians will ever hear. But we did our best to put together a gallery of the cream of the crop. And if you like these, you should check out our Bill Cosby comedian page for tons more videos, quotes, memes and photos of the man himself. But enough from me, check out these
34 Hilarious Bill Cosby Quotes and Jokes
It was because of my father that from the ages of seven to fifteen, I thought that my name was Jesus Christ and my brother, Russell, thought that his name was Dammit. "Dammit, will you stop all that noise?" And, "Jesus Christ, sit down!" One day, I'm out playing in the rain, and my father yelled, "Dammit will you get back in here!" I said, "Dad, I'm Jesus Christ!"