Everyone wants to come over for a swim, but they insist on peeing in the pool. Keeping your Pool clean is no laughing matter, but your Pool Sign can be.
There is no one besides Bobcat that could pull of the role of Carl Hefler in the 1987 movie Burlar. Here are a few of our favorite Bobcat Goldthwait burglar lines: “Kay-no-bee… K-noby! Is that like in Star Wars?” “Your Caucasian Mr Hefler”…….”OH GREAT THROW THAT IN MY FACE TO!!!” “Like-like-like-like-like-like-like you’re my idea of a dream come true – takin’ shit from a dildo with ears?” “Fuck you? Thank you very much! I come here to give you a fuckin’ package and you decide to blow me shit?” “You know when I was like five I said, Dad Dad!
Wow. We can only imagine how cathartic it must be to throw a rock at a $400,000 car that is being driven by a complete douche-bag who thinks it’s a good idea to race down a neighborhood street where children like to play. In this video, one fed up neighbor decided to take matters into his own hands (literally) when he tells a passing Lamborghini, who must be known to race through the neighborhood, to “keep racing” before he threatens action. The Lamborghini does just that, and in a fit of rage the neighbor takes a rock he must have
Watching this baby monkey get a bath has to be the cutest things we’ve seen IN A LONG TIME. I could seriously watch this baby be given a bath all day and night. The monkey is clearly in a veterinarian or other care center, and her care giver picks her up and brings her over to the washing area. The little monkey doesn’t know what’s going on but seems to kind of like the bath. The caregiver gives “bubbles” as she’s called her special baby bath and the cuteness just keeps on happening from there. We’ve seen a lot of
Two idiots decide to go bear hunting and return in an hour. Friend says “why are you back ?”Hunter says” not a good day .”Friend “says how do you know?”Other hunter says” sign on the road said ‘Bear Left’ so we turned around.
Everyone knows cats are smart and nothing can stands in their way of their friends. It doesn’t take long for the cat to figure out how to outsmart their two-legged friends. The only question is how high do we need to stack the rolls of toilet paper. This should be the next Olympics event.
We are going to need more cheese and a giant tub of olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper.
You’d think one of them would’ve seen it
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the
There was a blonde who just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. One evening, she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, “I’ve had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do. I memorized all the state capitals.” One of the guys, of course, said, “I don’t believe you. What is the capital
A robber comes into the store & steals a TV. A blonde runs after him and says, “Wait, you forgot the remote!”
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. “Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.” Dumbfounded, her date asked, “What do you mean?” “Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, ‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’ I’m like, hello?
a golden retriever
A guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, “Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes…”