If you’re a parent who celebrates Christmas, chances are you have an Elf on the Shelf and are taking full advantage of the fake disciplinary measures it can bring. For example, you better go to bed on time tonight because the Elf is watching you! Or, you better eat all your vegetables or else the Elf on the Shelf is going to tell Santa not to bring you that special present you’ve been wanting! Parents, you know the drill. But then there are other clever parents out there who have taken their Elf on the Shelf experience a wee bit
The good people at Reddit started a thread summarizing the backwards movie plots of their favorite movies. And it seemed pretty clear that Hollywood needs to de-boot (that should be a word) some of these movies plots and repackage them as new and totally different. Here’s a bunch of them and I have to say, 127 Hours and Jaws would be huge blockbusters. Here’s what some of the most popular movies ever would look like if their plots were backwards: 127 Hours An uplifting story about a one armed man who attaches a severed arm he found in the desert.
This video has it all: First, let’s break down the title of Topless Florida Woman Destroys McDonald’s. It has a topless woman (but don’t worry, this is SFW and all the naughty bits have been censored out.) She’s from Florida (of course.) She’s smashing up a McDonald’s on a security cam. And finally, while she’s in mid freak out and breaking as much Mickey D’s equipment as she can get her hands on (let’s be serious, though, what kind of satisfaction could you possibly get from breaking the microwave door at a McDonald’s?) she stops to enjoy herself a little
Everyone wants to come over for a swim, but they insist on peeing in the pool. Keeping your Pool clean is no laughing matter, but your Pool Sign can be.
Funny Pool Sign: Welcome to our OOL and L
125 Short and Funny Blonde Jokes

Two idiots decide to go bear hunting and return in an hour. Friend says “why are you back ?”Hunter says” not a good day .”Friend “says how do you know?”Other hunter says” sign on the road said ‘Bear Left’ so we turned around.
Bear Left
Everyone knows cats are smart and nothing can stands in their way of their friends. It doesn’t take long for the cat to figure out how to outsmart their two-legged friends. The only question is how high do we need to stack the rolls of toilet paper. This should be the next Olympics event.
Nice jump
We are going to need more cheese and a giant tub of olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper.
There’s a huge broccoli outside!!!
You’d think one of them would’ve seen it
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the
You can paint my porch
There was a blonde who just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. One evening, she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, “I’ve had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do. I memorized all the state capitals.” One of the guys, of course, said, “I don’t believe you. What is the capital
State Capitals
A robber comes into the store & steals a TV. A blonde runs after him and says, “Wait, you forgot the remote!”
A robber and a tv
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. “Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.” Dumbfounded, her date asked, “What do you mean?” “Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, ‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’ I’m like, hello?
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game
a golden retriever
A guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, “Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes…”