It wasn’t uncommon to see Rodney Dangerfield on the Tonight Show in the 60’s and 70’s. In fact, the comdian appeared on Johnny Carson’s show a total of 35 times. This might be one of his best appearances, however. You’ll laugh out loud when he says: “My doctor told me to run 5 miles a day for two weeks. I called him up and said ‘Doctor, I’m 70 miles away from my house.” Another favorite is “Last week I met the surgeon general. He offered me a cigarette.” Dangerfield also jokes about his wife and kids in this clip. “Last week
This dog does not like bears! In this hilarious video that originally surfaced in 2010 in the United Kingdom but recently went viral again the States, a dog named Akita is just hanging out with her owners, getting pet and licking faces, when she walks over to the family’s television and sees a bear chasing after a kid on the screen. The dog goes into attack mode (it sounds scarier than it is..it’s actually pretty adorable) and tries to take down the bear. Except unfortunately (or fortunately?) the bear is not there to fight the dog. A nearby human is
These funny pranks are so classic, we’re bummed we didn’t think of them first! If you’ve never seen a collection of funny pranks before, you should know that these are some of the best. You’ve got everything from the fake onion candy apples or the Purell in place of a personal lubricant, but there are some new funny pranks in there as well that are hilarious. A few favorites are the mac n’ cheese mix made to look like orange juice, the picture in a jar that is made to look like a human head, and the poster of Gollum from Lord of
The Price is Right announcer George Gray ate it on a treadmill on Thursday’s show, and the resulting video is hilarious. We are sure George Gray is feeling a little less than awesome after today’s stunt…I mean, talk about eating your pride. But even though George Gray took a nasty spill, he handled it as well as could be expected and laughed it off. And thankfully he was OK. But man…we have to say it to you, George. The Price was Wrong!
125 Short and Funny Blonde Jokes
Two idiots decide to go bear hunting and return in an hour. Friend says “why are you back ?”Hunter says” not a good day .”Friend “says how do you know?”Other hunter says” sign on the road said ‘Bear Left’ so we turned around.
Bear Left
Everyone knows cats are smart and nothing can stands in their way of their friends. It doesn’t take long for the cat to figure out how to outsmart their two-legged friends. The only question is how high do we need to stack the rolls of toilet paper. This should be the next Olympics event.
Nice jump
We are going to need more cheese and a giant tub of olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper.
There’s a huge broccoli outside!!!
Everyone wants to come over for a swim, but they insist on peeing in the pool. Keeping your Pool clean is no laughing matter, but your Pool Sign can be.
Funny Pool Sign: Welcome to our OOL and L
You’d think one of them would’ve seen it
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the
You can paint my porch
There was a blonde who just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. One evening, she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, “I’ve had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do. I memorized all the state capitals.” One of the guys, of course, said, “I don’t believe you. What is the capital
State Capitals
A robber comes into the store & steals a TV. A blonde runs after him and says, “Wait, you forgot the remote!”
A robber and a tv
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. “Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.” Dumbfounded, her date asked, “What do you mean?” “Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, ‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’ I’m like, hello?
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game
a golden retriever
