UCB comedy teacher/performer and BuzzFeed writer Ari Voukydis appeared on Jeopardy the other day and gave what might be the best jeopardy answer EVER. When Ari Voukydis was in Final Jeopardy, the clue given to him and the other contestants was: “In 1891, this European said, ‘Perhaps my factories will put an end to war sooner than your congresses.’” Clearly Ari Voukydis didn’t know the correct Jeopardy answer, so instead of making a guess he knew he would be pulling out of the dark, he gave the best answer ever. Ari Voukydis wrote the following as his response: “Who is this handsome gentleman?”
What happens when you don’t like a Beyoncé song? The Beygency! Andrew Garfield hosted SNL this past weekend and was overall pretty funny. One of the best skits of the night was his portrayal of a typical suburban husband who revealed he didn’t like Beyoncé’s song, “Drunk in Love” at a dinner party. What started off as a normal night turned into a nightmare as soon as Garfield admitted that it wasn’t one of Beyoncé’s best songs. As soon as he did the lights went out and helicopters started flying around their house. Andrew Garfield was forced go on the run
This clip of George Carlin on religion is exactly what you’d expect from a man who has made a career of skewering all of our institutions. There’s really no comedian better at taking all the things our society blindly holds dear and breaking them down to their elements to make them look ridiculous. For example in this George Carlin on religion clip, George just explains the concept of God in simple terms: There’s an invisible man in the sky who will make you burn forever if you don’t believe in him…but he loves you. That simple sentence right there has
Thanks, sign. But I THINK WE GOT THIS. Have you ever seen a funny warning sign and thought to yourself: Wait, what? Did someone really take the time to make that because they thought someone actually wouldn’t know that? Well, if you haven’t, today is your lucky day with this gallery of funny warning signs and instructions. I mean, how dumb do people think other people actually are? It’s like explaining to someone that they breathe in order to survive. Oh wait. One of these funny warning signs practically says that? That’s right. It actually warns people NOT TO
125 Short and Funny Blonde Jokes
Two idiots decide to go bear hunting and return in an hour. Friend says “why are you back ?”Hunter says” not a good day .”Friend “says how do you know?”Other hunter says” sign on the road said ‘Bear Left’ so we turned around.
Bear Left
Two idiots decide to go bear hunting and return in an hour. Friend says “why are you back ?”Hunter says” not a good day .”Friend “says how do you know?”Other hunter says” sign on the road said ‘Bear Left’ so we turned around.
Everyone knows cats are smart and nothing can stands in their way of their friends. It doesn’t take long for the cat to figure out how to outsmart their two-legged friends. The only question is how high do we need to stack the rolls of toilet paper. This should be the next Olympics event.
Nice jump
Everyone knows cats are smart and nothing can stands in their way of their friends. It doesn’t take long for the cat to figure out how to outsmart their two-legged friends. The only question is how high do we need to stack the rolls of …
We are going to need more cheese and a giant tub of olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper.
There’s a huge broccoli outside!!!
We are going to need more cheese and a giant tub of olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper.
Everyone wants to come over for a swim, but they insist on peeing in the pool. Keeping your Pool clean is no laughing matter, but your Pool Sign can be.
Funny Pool Sign: Welcome to our OOL and L
Everyone wants to come over for a swim, but they insist on peeing in the pool. Keeping your Pool clean is no laughing matter, but your Pool Sign can be.
You’d think one of them would’ve seen it
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the
You can paint my porch
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, …
There was a blonde who just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. One evening, she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, “I’ve had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do. I memorized all the state capitals.” One of the guys, of course, said, “I don’t believe you. What is the capital
State Capitals
There was a blonde who just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. One evening, she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with …
A robber comes into the store & steals a TV. A blonde runs after him and says, “Wait, you forgot the remote!”
A robber and a tv
A robber comes into the store & steals a TV. A blonde runs after him and says, “Wait, you forgot the remote!”
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. “Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.” Dumbfounded, her date asked, “What do you mean?” “Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, ‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’ I’m like, hello?
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. “Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and all the …
a golden retriever