The owners of these houses REALLY don’t want you to ring their doorbells this Halloween, as they’ve made perfectly clear in the funny notes that are direct and somewhat scary. These funny notes show that some people just don’t want to be disturbed, mostly because they have a kid that is sleeping and/or crazy dogs that they obviously don’t want barking up a storm. While we can understand the point of these funny notes, we’re always surprised at just how direct some people can be when it comes to their doorbells. I wouldn’t want to be a trick-or-treater who thinks it’s funny
The Eddie Murphy Raw marriage bit may be the best bit in this entire stand up special. And that’s saying something because Raw is one of the funniest stand up specials in the history of comedy. But this scene is amazing. Eddie has decided that it’s time to get married. He found the love of his life, until he’s at the grocery store and sees a tabloid with a sad Johnny Carson and a happy ex-wife who had gotten half of his money. Half! Since Johnny Carson had $300 million he had to give $150 to his now ex-wife. Half!
When’s the last time you heard a laughing parrot? Well, if you watch this hilarious video you can count that time as now! It’s hard to believe there’s a laughing parrot out there, but the guy in this video seems to have stumbled across one. I don’t know if this is a normal occurrence considering parrots DO like to mimic what they hear, but obviously this laughing parrot learned it from somewhere. And he does an amazing job recreating a human laugh in this video. I think if I owned a parrot I would get it to say extremely embarrassing things
Just when you think you’re going to have a great day on the lake, a seemingly innocent beer toss gone wrong can totally, totally ruin it for you. Watch this beer toss gone wrong video and watch as the trouble unfolds. It starts off as a fun joke, where the older guy in the boat ahead of the camera man asks his to throw a beer over. The guy (son?) holding the camera obliges, but he end up hitting him and the guy falls into the water like a brick. Talk about dangerous! Thankfully we think the guy is OK,
125 Short and Funny Blonde Jokes
Two idiots decide to go bear hunting and return in an hour. Friend says “why are you back ?”Hunter says” not a good day .”Friend “says how do you know?”Other hunter says” sign on the road said ‘Bear Left’ so we turned around.
Bear Left
Everyone knows cats are smart and nothing can stands in their way of their friends. It doesn’t take long for the cat to figure out how to outsmart their two-legged friends. The only question is how high do we need to stack the rolls of toilet paper. This should be the next Olympics event.
Nice jump
We are going to need more cheese and a giant tub of olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper.
There’s a huge broccoli outside!!!
Everyone wants to come over for a swim, but they insist on peeing in the pool. Keeping your Pool clean is no laughing matter, but your Pool Sign can be.
Funny Pool Sign: Welcome to our OOL and L
You’d think one of them would’ve seen it
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the
You can paint my porch
There was a blonde who just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. One evening, she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, “I’ve had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do. I memorized all the state capitals.” One of the guys, of course, said, “I don’t believe you. What is the capital
State Capitals
A robber comes into the store & steals a TV. A blonde runs after him and says, “Wait, you forgot the remote!”
A robber and a tv
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. “Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.” Dumbfounded, her date asked, “What do you mean?” “Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, ‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’ I’m like, hello?
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game
a golden retriever
