Everyone wants to come over for a swim, but they insist on peeing in the pool. Keeping your Pool clean is no laughing matter, but your Pool Sign can be.
This is what’s known as the I Love You Baby video. This little girl is just two months old and she is sitting on her dad’s chest. And her dad is saying “I love you” to this little baby over and over again. And she responds by smiling at him and generally being a super cute little baby in her pink little dress. So she sits there for a while staring into her dad’s eyes and goo gooing and ga gaing at him whenever he says something to her. But then something funny happens. After he says “I love you”
This clip of George Carlin on religion is exactly what you’d expect from a man who has made a career of skewering all of our institutions. There’s really no comedian better at taking all the things our society blindly holds dear and breaking them down to their elements to make them look ridiculous. For example in this George Carlin on religion clip, George just explains the concept of God in simple terms: There’s an invisible man in the sky who will make you burn forever if you don’t believe in him…but he loves you. That simple sentence right there has
Advertising agencies have one job to do, and that’s to put out an ad that makes sense and isn’t a total fail! If they did their jobs we wouldn’t have to call them out for their humiliating work in these photoshop fails, now would we? Somebody must have been sleeping on the job when they created these ads. From lost belly buttons, fake crowds, double foreheads and totally wrong skin colors, these photoshop fails should have gotten somebody fired. We love how obviously screwed up all of these ads are. It’s like a blind person photoshopped each and every one
Two idiots decide to go bear hunting and return in an hour. Friend says “why are you back ?”Hunter says” not a good day .”Friend “says how do you know?”Other hunter says” sign on the road said ‘Bear Left’ so we turned around.
Everyone knows cats are smart and nothing can stands in their way of their friends. It doesn’t take long for the cat to figure out how to outsmart their two-legged friends. The only question is how high do we need to stack the rolls of toilet paper. This should be the next Olympics event.
We are going to need more cheese and a giant tub of olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper.
You’d think one of them would’ve seen it
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?” The blonde said, “How about 50 dollars?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the
There was a blonde who just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. One evening, she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, “I’ve had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do. I memorized all the state capitals.” One of the guys, of course, said, “I don’t believe you. What is the capital
A robber comes into the store & steals a TV. A blonde runs after him and says, “Wait, you forgot the remote!”
A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. “Oh, I really liked it,” she replied, “especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn’t understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents.” Dumbfounded, her date asked, “What do you mean?” “Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, ‘Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!’ I’m like, hello?
a golden retriever
A guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, “Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes…”